I feel like Satan is the kinda guy who’d wear socks and sandles outside in public and give literally zero fucks
guys this super cute black girl came in my store with big, beautiful, natural hair and she was showing off her new red dress and i told her “you look so beautiful, just like annie!” and she and her mom didn’t know about the new movie coming out so i showed her the trailer and she said “mommy she looks just like me!” and her smile was so fucking huge
don’t tell me representation isn’t important
|(A gay couple has just met up in the restaurant and kissed each other upon arrival. Another customer has seen this and is obviously angry.)|
|Angry Customer:||“Damn f**s.”|
|Gay Man:||“Excuse me?”|
|Angry Customer:||“You heard me, you little s***. Let’s not make this into some little pride protest, okay? I have to accept that you’re going to live your lifestyle, and you have to accept that I’ve got freedom of speech.”|
|Gay Man:||*quietly* “Is it too much to ask for a little human decency?”|
|Angry Customer:||“Human? Listen up, what you’re doing is not human. I think I have the right to determine what I think is human.”|
|(The manager shows up. He’s a quiet Italian man who I assume is conservative due to the Christian imagery and portrait of Reagan he keeps around the restaurant.)|
|Angry Customer:||*to the owner* “Hey, can you move either them or us to another table?”|
|(Instead of responding to the angry customer, the owner instead speaks to his wife.)|
|Owner:||“I’m sorry ma’am, but we have a strict ‘no pets’ policy in my restaurant.”|
|Wife:||“Uh, I, uh, what? I don’t have a—”|
|Owner:||“Well, according to your talking monkey over here, I can determine who’s a human and who’s not. You bring an animal into my restaurant; I gotta assume it’s your pet.”|
|(The angry customer storms out. When I left, the owner was giving his description, and copies of security camera footage, to the biggest crowd of police I’ve seen. Apparently it’s a bad idea to not pay your bill at a restaurant that gives free coffee to cops.)|
Baby laughing while getting shots
> Rock star doctor.
I don’t care how old he will be I’m taking my future children to him
That person is in the right field! So many pediatricians are terrible with children; you can tell this person LOVES children and taking care of them.
OMG. I have no words as to how cute this is and how awesome this doctor is.
okay but imagine cecil and carlos deciding to get married and talking about if one of them wants to take the other’s last name or if they want to hyphenate or what
and cecil just is like “not that i don’t think every part of you is perfect but i think most people would agree…
His tie OMG
IS THAT THE JANITOR FROM NED’S DECLASSIFIED?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?
That’s Dara Norris, voice of both Dad and Cosmo, and also the janitor from Ned’s Declassified, m’friend.
I love everything about this.
HE WAS THREE CHARACTERS THAT WERE MY CHILDHOOD. EXCUSE ME WHILE I CRY.
I smell trouble brewing
The pope is just so fucking chill I love it
"Gays? Sure, that Catholic Church is open to everyone"
"Aliens? Sure, the Catholic Church is open to everyone"
Modern pope for the modern world.
He also digs the internet